"The Golden Age of Television" includes jabs at The Beverly Hillbillies and I Dream of Jeannie. To get her poor dog a bone Don't get me Jack and Jill went up the hill This page was last edited on 17 June 2021, at 12:40. In 1984, a small crowd of less than 100 people didn't know what to make of a chain-smoking, 50s greaser-throwback turning beloved Mother Goose nursery rhymes into offensively dirty poems about sex. Jack and Jill went up the hill,each with a buck and a quarter,Jill came down with two fifty.that fucking whore! If your chick's on her period And ate his own shit Peter, Peter, pumpkin-eater, Had a wife and couldn't keep her; He put her in a pumpkin shell, And there he kept her very well. "It's just so absolutely god-awful. His controversial act affected the number of venues that were willing to screen the film; it opened in 40 theatres nationwide on its opening day. I never incited riots. Andrew Dice Clay hates his marriage but he loves his wife -- so he filed for divorce even though the comedian plans to stay with his woman 'til death do they part. Come a little closer, I'll butter your fuckin' popcorn. going with the Pamela Andersons of the world. Georgie Porgie, pudding and pie Jerked off in his . Sometimes (though not often), I actually feel sorry for the women who post here. I'm disease free; I take care of myself, and I go to sleep. Or these big, heavyset lesbians You throw 'em in a drawer when you're done. Look what I'm doing to you now. And there he kept her very well. transcripts of his material - and, well, they couldn't find any 1. up and sloppy on the dance floor, all of a sudden I become your But I would do it. Andrew Dice Clay - The Evolution Of Dirty Nursery Rhymes Robert Peterson 3.46K subscribers Subscribe 11K Share 1.5M views 8 years ago In 1984, a small crowd of less than 100 people didn't. mind-expanding satirists like Bill Hicks were forced to labor away The Fora platform includes forum software by XenForo. Clay had signed a one-year deal with ABC which kept him from working with other networks. Add a video, Do you know any background info about this track? He needed the money. Sprayed his load across the screen And ruined Titanic's final scene Little Boy Blue - He needed the money. Kennedy squinched up Overview ; Biography ; Discography ; Songs Meanwhile, Clay's breakthrough came in 1988 when he performed at an all-male Big Brother Association dinner event with "all of Hollywood's royalty [] dressed in tuxedos and I show up in a black leather jacket with a flag on the back that said 'Rock and Roll'". It woke up the spider But we guess they were not. That fuckin' whore. Now his material would be considered clean comedy. Georgie Porgie, pudding and pie Jerked off in his girlfriend's eye When her eye was dry and shut Georgie fucked that one-eyed slut Old King Cole was a merry old soul A merry . I'm not saying this to 5-year-olds. [56][57] Clay was in an eight-year relationship with his ex-fiance, comedian Eleanor Kerrigan. threat who made it seem like comedy without dick jokes When she bent over, ", One female audience member, Heather Swanson, was mortified. outta the zoo. Little Boy Blue - The kind of humidity you get in Manhattan during the summer by the time you even get to the front doors of the mall, they're passing out. Andrew Dice Clay has a new Showtime series and is reviving his stand-up career. an independent producer for Warner Bros. Television emphatically she didn't despair She let Rover munch on her crack - Oh! No eye contact is all I could think. They have no kids together. However, a smattering of obedient "All over the country, stop cigarettes, stop fuckin' cigarettes. He shit pepperoni, You put me on stage, I'm the greatest stand-up ever in the history of American culture.". Her uterus fell out The thing is, Clay doesn't really do "jokes" per se. Extremely popular at the turn of the 1980s for his Mother Goose nursery rhymes, Andrew "Dice" Clay was a persona built upon misogyny, homophobia and Italian macho stereotypes that shocked middle class America. And Hollywood just gets weirder and weirder. [8] Clay's father was a boxer and real estate agent. Jack and Jill went up the hill. He supported these with a nationwide tour that included a headline show at Madison Square Garden, ten years after his two sold-out performances.[37]. [59] In August 2021, Clay was diagnosed with Bell's palsy, though the condition was declared temporary and he continues to perform live. The implication of the first stanza is that Peter murdered his first wife because she tried to leave the marriage. When it was over, if there were a garbage bag I would have worn it home. I dumped the bitch on the next block. I want to eat you like a tossed fucking salad! Who lived deep inside her. I never thought he was funny. [21] In 1994, Clay accepted more television roles. Sign up for the ARFCOM weekly newsletter and be entered to win a free ARFCOM membership. but people regard Clay with contempt, like he's doing more harm So, so you stick 'em on your dick, you can shave, shower, they don't get in the way. Below, is the true story of both Eeper the Weeper, and Peter the Pumpkin. You ever notice that? Then comes the goo from Betty's crack. even though the comedian plans to stay with his woman 'til death do they . Selected Nursery Rhymes of A.D. Clay Hickory Dickory Dock. It first appeared published in America in 1825, in Mother Gooses Quarto. He is an actor and producer, known for The Adventures of Ford Fairlane (1990), Blue Jasmine (2013) and A Star Is Born (2018). With them jowls hanging down. Year Published: 1920 Language: English Country of Origin: United States of America Source: Barnes, W. Instructions: Print the template of your choice (below) Templates: Close the template window after printing to return to this screen. How much do they weigh? [46] In November 2014, Clay released his book The Filthy Truth.[47]. And I ain't your pop. I want to eat you like a tossed fucking salad! The rhyme is well known in the US, too. Along came a spider and sat down beside her. And said, "Hey, what's in the bowl, bitch?" Extremely popular at the turn of the 1980s for his Mother Goose nursery rhymes, And, Controversial (and, in many cases, extremely loathed) comedic alter ego of actor Andrew Clay Silverstein. Went to the cupboard Scrobbling is when Last.fm tracks the music you listen to and automatically adds it to your music profile. And licked her asshole clean And I hate when they put cologne on it. Yeah, and I'm jerking off too, honey. Up in San Francisco, the fag capitol of California, they passed a bill, you can't even smoke in the street. All Rights Reserved. [58], In November 2017, Clay had a stent placed in a partially blocked artery. Peter, Peter, pumpkin eater. He appeared in an episode of Raising Hope as himself which aired on November 29, 2011. He has been married to Valerie Silverstein since February 14, 2010. Released in March 1990 on Geffen Records, the album sold 250,000 copies in seven weeks,[14][22] peaking at No. Quotes [ edit] Dice Rules (1991) [ edit] When you jerk off, you're saying "Hey, I care about me." What am I looking at? [45], In July 2013, Clay signed a book deal with Simon & Schuster for a memoir to be co-authored with David Ritz. Andrew Dice Clay Tells Us A Nursery Rhyme Comedy Dynamics 416K subscribers Try it free Subscribe 1.6K Share Save 260K views 2 years ago Watch Andrew Dice Clay: One Night With Dice on Apple. She kept in her backyard. stage presence, a character affectionately referred to as Diceman. His most famous and funny bit, "Mother Goose," is a string of X-rated versions of nursery rhymes. You smack him in the face with your dick five or six times? And she got a bone of her own. Little Miss Muffet Who lived in a shoe In May 2012, Clay appeared on The Joe Rogan Experience podcast and also did a set at The Bamboozle festival in Asbury Park. He even brought my roommate into it, fantasizing what would it be like to have both 'pairs' in his face. Well you see, though the reason its trending cant be confirmed, we have a feeling its to do with the fact that the internet just found out about the real meaning behind another nursery rhyme, This little piggy went to the market. Smacked her twice across the head [55] Clay's third marriage was with hairstylist Valerie Vasquez from 2010 to 2014. Sprayed his load across the screen The cat and the fiddle, Should they really be told and remembered? Jill came down with $2.50, Little miss muffet sat on a tuffet eating her curds and whey. Kennedy tried her darnedest to give Dice the smackdown. Extremely popular at the turn of the 1980s for his Mother Goose nursery rhymes, Andrew "Dice" Clay was a persona built upon misogyny, homophobia and Italian macho stereotypes that shocked middle class America. [20], In February 1990, Clay became the first comedian to sell out two consecutive nights at Madison Square Garden in New York City,[15] totalling 38,000 people in attendance. Peter, Peter, Pumpkin Eater. Andrew Dice Clay was born on September 29, 1957 in Brooklyn, New York City, New York, USA. altogether. https://en.wikiquote.org/w/index.php?title=Andrew_Dice_Clay&oldid=2972706, When you jerk off, youre saying Hey, I care about me.. Yep and unfortunately no one would show him on TV. Roses are red, Hickory Dickory Dock [43] In an interview with Good Day L.A., Clay stated that, as he had not been in a movie in 12 years, "It was a thrill to do something dramatic, something I've always wanted to do. ", Women sitting front row center were regularly traumatized by Dice's The situation led to a change in his stand-up act, focusing more on being a husband and a father yet still with an "edge".[34]. The original nursery rhyme goes like this: Peter, Peter, pumpkin eater,Had a wife but couldnt keep her;He put her in a pumpkin shellAnd there he kept her very well. the sex material, but it wasn't to hurt, it was to make jokes. [13] A picture of him on stage during his early sets at Pips was described: "[Clay] In a baggy white shirt, pants rolled up to his knees and a pair of thick glasses", with a black leather jacket underneath the shirt so he could seamlessly switch to his Travolta character when the lights went out. A New Showtime series and is reviving his stand-up career stop cigarettes stop... Third marriage was with hairstylist Valerie Vasquez from 2010 to 2014 stop fuckin popcorn... In 1994, Clay does n't really do `` jokes '' per.! To have both 'pairs ' in his the street November 29, in! Jill went up the spider But we guess they were not most famous and funny bit, ``,... ] in 1994, Clay does n't really do `` jokes '' se! Truth. [ 47 ] Jill came down with two fifty.that fucking whore the music you to. The Filthy Truth. [ 47 ] story of both Eeper the Weeper, and I 'm disease ;. 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